I’m not quite sure if I really need to have a blog or not, but here I go anyways.
I used to journal a lot in the past, and I found it very helpful for my inner life. Then I met Jaclyn, and I kind of forgot to do stuff like that. I’m thinking that I’d like to start doing so again.
So, I guess this might be more for my sake than for the sake of other readers, but merely by posting this in the way that I am, I guess that maybe it’ll be for others too. I want it to (hopefully) be a chronology of my journey into Christ; to be thoroughly baptized into his death and life.
I want to know Him. I mistake this for knowing about Him far too often. That’s why I’m thankful for my wife and for community. They keep me out of trouble like that. For instance, I led a housegroup talk last night on apathy, but I think that I probably learned more out of it than anyone else on account of the terrific participation of our group!
I learned that we’re far too results-oriented as Christians – or at least I am. The way of Christ does not call us to make things happen. Jesus asks us to love Him and be faithful to Him in all our ways. One might even say that it’s – at the risk of sounding dreadfully stodgy – about obedience and perseverance. Hebrews 11 talks about all of these people who clung to God in radical faith, and verse 39 says something astounding: “These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised.”
All of those incredible God-followers didn’t see results. The results were known by the condition of their hearts and by the good works that they persevered in. This message is consistent with the gist of the whole book of Hebrews, which was essentially an encouragement for Christians to remain faithful amidst some very negative results (ie persecution). Read on into Chapter 12 too, it’s good stuff.
God, help me to remember that your kingdom does not work on our business models. I need to concern myself with loving You and others, not “results.” What a strange kingdom You run. It makes no sense to me at all. I’m enthralled by it, Lord. Let me see it. Let me see You.